Oh my god
They are all here. All the men I’ve loved or cared for. Dead and alive. The men who have inspired me, motivated me, made me cry, made me laugh, every single one of them.
Can I send some of them back and keep the ones I choose. Or do I have to take all or nothing? If I have to choose I’ll take them all
The ones who loved me, the ones who didn’t the ones with gentle spirits the ones who drove me insane, the musicians and the cops, the Artists and the bankers, the sailors and the engineers they are all a part of who is standing on the threshold today , the person I am today.
Do I have to invite them all in at once or can I pass out numbers and let some of them stand outside for a day or a month or I don’t know. I’ll have to come up with some sort of a rating system for most of them but some require no thought at all.
How exhilarating to see them all in one place at one time. The most important and compelling almost seem to glow from within. The assholes fade into the cement of the walkway and become almost unrecognizable.
Do I get a wish? Can I keep a couple in the spare room and let them out when I need their special kind of magic?>
Ugh a wet tongue licks my face and as I open my eyes I see 2 dogs one on either side of me so close I am trapped under the covers. I don’t want to wake up yet. Go away.
The older one lies down and stretches out as Far as he can to try to eject me from the bed. The other one steps up on the pillow and collapses on my head. I shrug them away and I pull the covers over my head.
I miss you, I say to Keith, I play the cd all the time and I can hear the trumpet on every cut. I can see your small Buddhist bow and hear the whispered Namaste as you prepare to leave the stage.